i told you so

this is 'the another night' where i find myself looking at the bed.. thinking to myself how nice sleeping is.. and how i wish i could get some of that nice juicy sleep =/

its such a temptation to have a bed in front/behind/beside you when you work lah. so the best way is to work on top of the bed =D which usually result in me dozing off anyway. =(

anyways. smt lol happened just now. was taking my shower. so, i shower shower shower lah. then there was a lizard on the ceiling right on top of me. and i found myself telling it "if you fall on me, i'm gonna kill you.."

so it went away haha. or so i thought lah. i was washing my hair when i felt i stepped on smt soft. looked down. guess what. i stepped on the freaking lizard..

few things that came to my mind when that happened. one was, if la i get married next time, and my wife happen have the same encounter, i dunno whether to laugh or to help her.. if wanna help also how to help? imagine your wife screaming at the shower and all lol. and you go in panicking just to find a lizard running for its life. or worse. your husband! xD

another thing is smt about crushing the serpent under foot and it will bruise my heel. its smwhere in the bible lah.. lol anyways, i didn't do it the biblical way. too messy. and i can't imagine smashing the lizard underfoot lah with its goo all over my leg and my bathroom tiles. you imagine for me lah.. so yeah.. gravity is growing stronger nowadays, beware tall people.

nuff said.


p/s : kay lah. the lizzie didn't die. i just kicked it aside. without breaking off any of its parts. and it escaped and live happily ever after.. eating flies and mosquitoes.

Validation

its a cool video. ita just 15 minutes long, but i guess its worth it. watch it if you've time. because you are great.



hope this warms your heart. and know that you... are great, you have an amazing face, did anyone ever tell you that? and someday, people are gonna love you for what you are. =P

encouragement really do wonders.

the art of losing myself

i realize alot of things. i realize the 'so much more' that i've been missing all this while, either because of ignorance or because i want to do everything fast.

so yes. i guess during these few months i've certainly learned alot. in a way its like slowing down. taking a pause to observe the world. i realize that people, are actually quite lonely on the inside. altho they may have lots of company outside (i'm sure you guys have heard this before), but really, when not around people, they're lonely on the inside. even around people you can be lonely, no? you may feel companionship, but it doesn't really satisfy.

i've known some friends, they go watch movies alone. i guess people nowadays would say things like 'sad person' or the stuff like that. i'm also guilty i guess. there was a question i had to answer recently: are you fine being alone?

initially i thought, of course i'm fine. i like being home alone. but let me rephrase the question, are you fine going to the movies alone? are you fine going to shop alone in a huge shopping mall? are you fine having a meal outside just by yourself? etc. well, i'm not. so much for thinking that i like being alone.

something i realized. in as much as there are pros in having company around you, i think there's something we can all learn in being lonely. by lonely i mean - just you, and God. because i believe with all thats going on in this world now, people are all so busy doing their own things, hanging out with frens and all, etc..

that they left God out. Hence i think that God is actually quite lonely lorh. and thats why i feel that a lonely person may find it easier to truly discover God in a way greater than those who aren't. its like, in this aspect of loneliness, the more we give our time to be spent with God (in physical loneliness), that we're actually having a more fulfilling communion than with our many frens. and i guess thats what i really desire more now.

the more i lose myself in this area, the more i want to lose.

you know what? i really don't know how to explain this, but its just something i felt throughout these months. that through the lonely times, i actually feel satisfied.

i'm not good with describing how i feel. and i guess i'm blogging this as a memo for myself.